Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
