Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
