I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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