Texts From Last Night

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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I am engaged

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  To a real live girl that has met me

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  (262): I am engaged (262): To a real live girl that has met me http://tfl.nu/4ln0
  Replies (7) Good night (1641) Bad night (643)
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  (310): View more from California

  it's too hot outside to masturbate.

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  (310): it's too hot outside to masturbate. http://tfl.nu/dql5
  Replies (19) Good night (694) Bad night (1629)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.

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  (207): it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck. http://tfl.nu/q2n8
  Replies (80) Good night (933) Bad night (5896)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van

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  (727): Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van http://tfl.nu/7qz4
  Replies (13) Good night (2203) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  yet...

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  (732): nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug. (732): Needless to say there is no second date for this girl. (862): yet... http://tfl.nu/och4
  Replies (44) Good night (917) Bad night (6238)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.

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  (601): After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable. http://tfl.nu/u7w9
  Replies (5) Good night (2794) Bad night (1183)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.

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  (402): Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped. http://tfl.nu/qxzn
  Replies (7) Good night (3262) Bad night (2244)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him

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  (443): Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him http://tfl.nu/oz4m
  Replies (7) Good night (2767) Bad night (1072)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing

  (206): View more from Washington

  and semen

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  (360): it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing (206): and semen http://tfl.nu/0fmk
  Replies (14) Good night (4438) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.

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  (814): I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood. http://tfl.nu/fkn8
  Replies (10) Good night (1186) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"

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  (682): Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this" http://tfl.nu/tpaw
  Replies (1) Good night (1441) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.

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  (+44): You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life. http://tfl.nu/zp27
  Replies (6) Good night (554) Bad night (1571)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??

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  (716): Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again?? http://tfl.nu/md65
  Replies (4) Good night (347) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.

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  (404): Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip. http://tfl.nu/cx8v
  Replies (2) Good night (308) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick

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  (315): He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick http://tfl.nu/ogpi
  Replies (5) Good night (285) Bad night (464)

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