In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
