Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
