My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Randomize
