Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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