i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
