id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
