Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize