Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
