Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
