i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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