we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
