Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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