She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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