Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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