do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
