I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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