a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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