I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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