i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize