Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
