Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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