This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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