you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
How naked do you want me to be?
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