Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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