I bet he comes in French.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
