i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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