y did u give ur computer a hand job?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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