I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
