apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
