im about as happy as oj after his trial
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
