what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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