I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Randomize
