sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
