For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all