and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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