Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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