Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
