You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
