Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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