He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
