You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
