she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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