Dual....:-)
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize