I showed him my bush... on skype.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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