I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
