You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
where are my eyebrows?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
