Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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